A burglar breaks into a house late at night. He’s going through all of the family’s belongings when he hears a voice say, “Jesus is watching you.”



He looks around and sees no one, and thinks he’s imagining things. He goes back to what he’s doing and again hears a voice say, “Jesus is watching you.”

He shines his flashlight on a parrot in a cage across the room. “Are you the one saying ‘Jesus is watching me’?” he asks the parrot.

“Yes,” the parrot replies.

“What’s your name?” the burglar asks.


“My name is Clarence.”

“Clarence?” the burglar laughs. “That’s a dumb name for a parrot. What idiot named you Clarence?”

The parrot answers, “The same idiot who named his pit bull Jesus.”