Raise
The maid requested a raise and the lady of the house was unhappy about it. She asked, “Now, Jessica, why do you think you deserve a raise?”
Jessica: “There are three reasons why I requested the raise. First, I iron better than you do.”
Lady of the house: “Who said that?”
Jessica: “Why, your husband.”
Lady of the house: “Oh, OK. What is the second reason?”
Jessica: “Second, I cook better than you.”
Lady of the house: “Who said that?”
Jessica: “Your husband.”
Lady of the house: “And, what is the third reason?”
Jessica: “Third, I am better in bed than you.”
Lady of the house, angrily: “Did my husband say that?”
Jessica: “No, the pool boy did.”
Jessica got the raise she was looking for.