Long Jokes

The Pope decides to take a cross-country tour across America, beginning in California and ending in New York. Somewhere in the Mid-West, the Popemobile breaks down, and while it’s repaired, the Pope…

A freshman is talking to the new girl in school. “You’ll like it here,” he tells her. “Everyone is pretty chill, the teachers are all nice, but the principal is kind of…

A little boy was at the supermarket checkout with a huge box of detergent. The checkout girl, trying to be friendly, asked him he had a lot of laundry to do. “Not…

A Nazi walks into a bar, looks around, and notices an older orthodox Jewish man seated at a nearby table. Barman, he says, “A round on me, for all your patrons, but…

An old woman took her husband to the doctor. The doctor checked the husband’s pulse, then told the woman, “I’m sorry, your husband is dead.” The woman was shocked. “I don’t believe…

A Mini Cooper with dark tinted windows pulls up next to a Rolls Royce at a red light. The Mini driver rolls down his window and asks the Rolls Royce driver, “You…

A woman walks into a diner carrying a dog under her arm. She puts the dog on the counter and announces that the dog can talk. The woman says she has $100…

A US Navy cruiser anchored in Mississippi for a week’s shore leave. The first evening, the ship’s Captain received the following note from the wife of a very wealthy and influential plantation…